On Tuesday, Brad's grandmother died.
On Wednesday, i busted two tires on my way to a wedding rehearsal.
On Friday, we attended Brad's grandmother's funeral. It was exhausting but we were surrounded by family & that was good. Brad & his dad went to look at my car but couldn't get the tires replaced or my blazer home. Long story.
On Saturday, Brad & his dad went to work on my car. They got it home but i still am without new tires. We also discovered something is wrong with the a/c.
On Sunday, we noticed the dryer isn't drying.
Today I thought things would be better, but they are a bit stressful at work. "A bit" doesn't really do it justice. It's quite overwhelming. And yes, i do like my job wayyyy more than i did when i was receptionist - but it still very stressful.
I also am really feeling discouraged with my weightloss journey. I know i mainly write about it on my weightloss blog, Try Try Again, but i just want to vent here for a second. This morning i saw a friend's blog that lost 10.9 pounds this past week. She has weigh-ins like that all the time & she isn't working out any more than i am. She is also eating a very healthy amount of calories. I am usually extrememly happy for her, but this time i just wasn't. I love her a lot & have been so proud of her so far in her journey. But today i was jealous. Today she lost 10.9 pounds & that got her to 100.9 pounds lost in SEVEN MONTHS.
I do not understand why this has to be the biggest struggle ever for me. I mean, seriously - if you saw me in person you would tell me to put down the donuts. But i don't eat donuts. I will have a cookie if one is available - but only one & it is well thought out. I am loading up on fruits & veggies, lean proteins & whole grains. I rarely have junk. I've quit fast food, though i have a few times given in to that temptation. I have quit soft drinks, except for the occasional diet sprite. I drink water like you wouldn't believe. For the past month, i have consistently worked out - 4 days a week - 30 minutes each time - for 4 weeks solid. I peeked at the scale & have lost NOTHING in the last month. NADA. ZILCH.
And although i have lost 20 pounds, it took me an entire YEAR to do it & i haven't lost anything else in over a month now. Why is this so freaking difficult??? I hate to be a whiner, but let me just say...
IT IS NOT FAIR!
Of course i will keep it up, because i really want to lose this fat... but i'm just saying. It sucks. I will do better this next month than i am doing now... I will sign up for the new membership class at the YMCA & that includes some personal training. But this week i am sharing a car with Brad because mine is not fixed yet. And so there is no way for me to work out getting to the gym with us carpooling. I will have to work out at home, but i am just saying - that is a real struggle for me.
Please do not comment that it is probably just muscle & muscle weighs more than fat. I swear, if i had a nickel for everytime i've heard that, i would be rich! I know that is true, but i haven't even begun strength training yet & surely i would have still lost SOMETHING in this month!!
So let's just say that i am stressed out at work, stressed out about finances (since everything is breaking) & stressed out about my weight. I do not want to struggle. I want to enjoy life.
There are good things going on -
1- I love my life with Brad. He is truly wonderful & makes everyday brighter.
2- I went to a beautiful wedding Saturday.
3- I went to a fun bachelorette party last night & loved the girl time.
4- Carpooling with Brad = more time with him. :)
5- I'm done with The Sound of Music & can now focus on my health journey more.
6- If i was still single, i would have had to call Dad when my tires busted...& he would not have been happy! At least my hubby is sweet about it. :)
7- Saturday i get to see a good friend marry her love!
8- Did i mention i love my love life & that i am HOME in the evenings this week?!
Ok, so life isn't all bad...