I did not mean to desert my blog, y'all.

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Guys. My apologies for not writing in 590404 years!! I was doing so well when the year started, having lots to blog about. But suddenly, I got nothin! Or, when i do have something I am just too busy & non-stop... by the time i get home, i crash, leaving no time for blogging! Or reading blogs! I must catch up on that ASAP!

Anyway. This is going to be super random, because i have probably lots of unrelated things to say. Or maybe not. I'm just kind of winging it.

 

Hmm...where to start? 

Three weeks ago? I randomly ran into Vicki Yohe. Now, Vicki Yohe used to be my FAVORITE singer, i went to a concert & i have her cd. I haven't heard from awhile but apparently she is still singing like crazy! I met her by random coincidence & THEN she came back & gave me her new cd! & it is amazing! AHHHH! Check her out, y'all. Amazing soulful voice. 

 

The only 2 things i have to share about 2 weeks ago is, 

 

#1, i got a great haircut at Salon Boheme by the fabulous Erica (who was one of my students when i worked at Aveda)(I say "my" student, but i wasn't a teacher there! I know nothing about doing hair, just to be clear!) 

 

 

When i left the salon, I FELL! HARD!!!! Nobody saw, thank you dear LORD, but i hurt myself pretty bad. I couldn't bend my knee hardly at all the next day, and it was still incredibly sore on day two. After two or three days, i could bend it but could NOT put ANY pressure on it... and that is still how it is today! YIKES! I mean, it doesn't hurt at ALL anymore until i need to get on my knee for some reason (this happens more than you would think!) & then i scream out in pain! And there is a bruise ALL THE WAY DOWN MY LEG! 

 

 

But the haircut was worth it. Maybe. Maybe i should have gotten the haircut but watched my step when i left the salon... 

 

& #2, i got a sweet gift from one of my favorite bloggers, Erika, in the mail! Notice these two awesome things happened by people named Erika. Both spell it with a 'k', too. Free book & awesome haircut. Apparently erikas are awesome. The end. :) P.S. I finished the book & it was SO GOOD & FUNNY! Who wants to read it next?! It is "Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me & other concerns" & is written by Mindy Kaling, who is a writer/director/actor on The Office. 

 

(Technically this may be in the 3 weeks ago category. I haven't blogged in so long, i don't even know what today is.) 

 

 

Annnnd, on to last week!

Last week SUCKED. With a capital S. Especially Wednesday & Sunday. (Sunday of this week. Which is not last week, but it is being clumped with last week, i guess.)

 

I can't really remember Monday. Tuesday was work & my Bible Study. Wednesday was CRY ALL DAY LONG BECAUSE INFERTILITY SUCKS!!!!!

 

Seriously. It started at the eye doctor. Hubby & I had a (LONG OVERDUE) eye doctor visit & while we were in the waiting room we started talking about infertility. I was emotional already, i guess, but hadn't verbalized it. After we talked about it, I pulled out my little index card notebook where i had written scriptures in it to read when i am afraid or angry or sad. I read every one to Brad & when i got to the second to last one, it said, "Children are a blessing, a reward from the Lord." or something like that. I started telling Brad that I didn't understand WHY God was so bent on blessing EVERYONE ELSE with this reward, everyone but me! (I know that isn't true, but it was my perspective in that moment!) I couldn't even finish what i was saying before my voice broke & I headed to the bathroom. The receptionist was probably like "WHAT IN THE WORLD?!" If only she knew.

 

I came back to my seat, after collecting myself, we had our appointment, got some new contacts & ordered some new glasses! YEAH!

 

Side note: Our new glasses came in this week, and we have yet to go get them, because their hours are 8-5 Mon-Thurs, and 8-12 on Friday. Seriously??? I cannot take off of work just to go pick up my glasses!! Geez.  (My work is open 7am-6pm Mon-Thurs and 7am-5pm on Fridays just to accommodate working people! I guess i assumed an eye doctor place would be the same way. Gah.) So you will see my super cute new glasses later. I like them so much I might actually wear them more than just at night & on weekends! Maybe.

 

We got home & i had a meltdown again (basically, finishing the meltdown from the eye doctor... since it wasn't for the public & I had to cut it short! Ha!).

 

I came to work, and the emotions of the morning were just below the surface. I did NOT feel okay. I thought if one person looked at me wrong, it would be all over with! HA! Well, first, my hubby texted me that i couldn't spend a DIME, because we were financially in a bind after our fertility treatments + that eye doctor appointment (which cost us much more than we imagined considering i have vision insurance! BLAH!) (I may have also done a little bit of overspending). Not five minutes after his text, my boss came to get me & had me walk with her to another lady's office so she could tell me ... well, it's a long story, and really not something i should blog about, but just know it made me really mad & i was thinking the whole time, "do not cry, do not cry, do not cry" but i did cry, because that's what i do when i get mad! When they were finished telling me what they had to tell me (which had to do with missing work due to infertility treatments & snow days!!), I had to go to the restroom & have another meltdown & get myself together & go back to work. And then i started crying AGAIN when my boss came in to see if i was okay. Basically... i cried all day long! Mostly in public! Which is basically my least favorite thing to do, ever. AHHHHH!!! 

 

Worst day ever, y'all. Although I do have a really sweet coworker. :) 

(It did cheer me up. But just a little bit.)

Side Note: Did you know Natalie Grant battled infertility? I had no idea! This was her FB status last week!

 

Thursday was fine, no tears at work, although i did have some tears that morning! Just very very sad. About life. I felt very... fragile... all day at work. That's the only word i know to describe it! Okay, but shaky.

 

Friday, things perked up a bit as it was Valentine's Day! We had decided to celebrate ours on Sunday, so i was surprised to go get my morning coffee & see some beautiful roses! Yay! (Yes, i like Valentine's Day!! Trust me, my hubby would not get me flowers out of obligation on any day of the year! And, who cares if it is commercialized, so is EVERY OTHER HOLIDAY!!! The end.)  (Also... Kelly wins the award for my FAVORITE Valentine's post every year. She had a similar one last year, and this year she did not disappoint me again! Ha! Thank you, Kelly!)

 

 

I had told Brad last year not to spend so much on flowers! I mean, he made the mistake of TELLING ME how much they cost & i was sick!! Seriously. So i told him that Whole Foods & Fresh Market have BEAUTIFUL flowers for WAY cheaper than Heroman's! Anyway, he got these from Whole Foods & they are GORGEOUS! I am only telling you all of this, because these are the biggest fullest roses i have seen & cost a lot less than previous valentines! (You can't even tell in this pic how gorgeous they are!) 

 

 Valentine's Day at work - in my new shirt with my "love" necklace & heart earrings. :)

 

I also worked a show this weekend! This lady from our theater, Celeste, did a Valentine's concert. I was her stage manager & ran sound & lights. It was AMAZING! I am so glad i was able to do this. It was only one rehearsal (Thursday night) & two performances (Friday night & Saturday matinee), and it was a great show. She sang a bunch of popular old love songs that are from musicals & it was very very good. The lighting was excellent! (That sounds like i am bragging on myself but i didn't design the lights! I just pushed the button so they would change on stage!) Dr. Terry Byars, an EXCELLENT pianist was her accompaniest, and this man Andre sang some songs with her too. They also had a teen boy play a penny whistle to one song that was irish. It was beautiful & I had a blast! 

 

Me with Celeste & Andre 

Remember i said Sunday was another bad day. Not as bad as Wednesday but still. Sunday morning, i had meltdown #49040 of the week before we left for church. I almost didn't go, but i changed my mind and went. I stayed in the car when we arrived long enough to stop crying so i could put my makeup on! After music practice, Brad found a starbucks gift card in his wallet, and i just happen to think that that was a God-thing! So we had a quick mini-date at Starbucks. This means we skipped Sunday School. This may or may not be our third time to do this. Ha! (We were back in time for service. In case you were wondering!) The sermon was really good for me & we stood for prayer. I am sure at this point people are wondering what is wrong with me, since i used to be so happy all the time & now i cry at church all the time!) (Not many know about our infertility at church. Most of them don't know i blog.)

 
We were supposed to go to lunch after church for our valentine celebration, but we remembered that our neighborhood was having a jambalaya dinner to meet the new owners, so we went to that instead. I mean, free jambalaya??? Seriously? (If you have not had good jambalaya, you are missing out! Please get you some next time you come to Louisiana!) So we did that. It was quite hilarious seeing me & Brad (two introverts) sitting at a table around a bunch of people we don't know (our neighbors). Hahaha. Yeahhhhhh, we were not the biggest conversationalists but it's all good. The jambalaya was excellent. So it was worth it.

 

Afterwards we went home & watched the rest of Scandal season two all afternoon. I mean, ALL afternoon!!! It took from after lunch to way past our bedtime. It was worth it. AMAZING show! Excellent writing! Brilliant acting!! I love the characters (except Fitz & Hollis! I love Fitz's hair though.) Anyway, now we have to wait for Season 3 to get on Netflix! SOB!!!!! But seriously. If watching back-to-back Scandal episodes curled up on the couch with Brad was our valentine's instead of dinner, that is FINE WITH ME! :)

 

SO, yeah! That's about it! I am very excited about this weekend, though. I am going on a little trip with some of the girls from my infertility support group. Two of them are riding with me to the Women of Faith conference in Houston!!!!! It is Friday night & Saturday morning. Then we will hang out or go out to eat or something & spend another night. On Sunday we are meeting up with several other girls in our group for the RESOLVE walk. RESOLVE is a national organization that supports couples dealing with infertility. They are doing a walk to raise awareness. Our leader, Beth, wants to do our own 5k here in Baton Rouge, so we are going to get ideas! And to support Resolve, of course! :) It'll be a great time! 

 

Thanks to those of you that are still here! This is what happens when i don't blog for so long!! I write novels instead of blog posts!